PRO Ductivity Powder
Issue: Issue 348.5
Posted Date: 4/1/2014
Fess up, fellow woodworker: Sometimes our shops are refuges, plain and simple. They're a place to escape from a nagging spouse, the pesky grandkids wanting another
ride around the yard on your lawn tractor or just that quiet zone you need to catch a few winks without guilt. But, being in the shop means you need to be doing SOMETHING, right?! It can't look like flagrant idle time, or you'll blow your cover. You need to show that progress of some meaningful sort is actually happening out there!
You need professional help. Serious "PRO" fessional help!
We at Alleyby Industries can make you look productive without actually being productive, and all it takes is a dusting of our new PRO Ductivity Powder. What is it, you rightly ask? It's simple science, really. We've blended a proprietary mix of sawdust from six different species of native and exotic hardwoods. There's also a little garage floor dirt and some lathe shavings added in for good measure. All in all, it's a perfect blend of shop "busy-ness" that will have your bases covered ... even if you're just out there watching Scott Phillips build something on cable.
PRO Ductivity Powder is easy to use. Throw a few handfuls on your shirt, pants and shoes before you leave the shop. Or while you're in the shop, if the chance for nosy visitors is high. In that case, toss some on before you start lounging around. If you're blessed enough to still have a head of hair, don't forget to massage some powder into your mane, too. Apply liberally to achieve full effect, then stride confidently back into the house. You're a woodworker! You're busy gettin' it done! And you're dusty enough to prove it!
A 12-ounce jar of PRO Ductivity Powder sells for $12.99.
But wait... There's MORE!!!
Act now, and you'll receive a special FREE GIFT! We'll rush you our 60-minute "Machine Sounds of the Industrial Revolution" CD, absolutely free. It'll give all within earshot an hour's worth of head-pounding industrial white noise, plus an ear-splitting lunch whistle! Use it with PRO Ductivity Powder to enhance your shop's full "factory" effect.
To order, visit Rocklare.com.