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Say What?
Issue: Issue 195.5
Posted Date: 4/1/2008

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Definitive Answers

"Maybe I am missing something, but the answers to the question 'which is stronger, a dovetail joint or a mortise and tenon joint' were anything but definitive." – Crystal Ball

Yep, you're missing something all right. – Editor

"This is either very curious or very clever, but the web address given for the spray-on sawdust, reputedly able to attract women with its scent, was chickmag.net, as in 'chick magnet.' I wonder if anyone besides me noticed that." – Sammy Colon

Nope. – Editor

"That question about the dead mouse in the saw carton seemed a bit dicey. Wouldn't a dead mouse draw flies?" – Drew Peacock

Of course not. For one thing, mice don't have opposable thumbs, so they can't hold a pencil to draw anything. Besides, it is dead. Duh! – Editor


Awl Aboard

"I found that Internet thread about the antique awl in the Web Surfer's review hard to believe, not because something like that couldn't happen, but rather because that is one of the oldest jokes in the vintage woodworking tool pantheon. I first heard it as an antique axe whose handle was replaced three times and its head twice." – Adam Zappel

"What the heck is a pantheon? Isn't that some building in Greece?" – Wanda Dantz

 Dashed if we know. – Editor



Warped

"I just wanted to tell you guys that I used some of that Warp Be Gone and it is great. It's everything they promise and more." – Lisa Carr

"You are so full of crap. There's no such thing. You're just sucking up to the editor." – Bill Fold

"Bite me." – Lisa Carr


This Can't Be!

"Look, I have written to you before about this, but it is not possible to publish an article, and in the very same issue, also have letters to the editor about that very same article. It's just not possible. And don't give me some cock-and-bull story like you did before about how it is due to the miracle of super-fast Internet. That's just cow flop." – Bonnie Fyde

You're absolutely right. Nostra culpa. – Editor



Typo Corner

Some typos are so obvious, and so funny, that no editorial comment is needed. – Editor


"I made a straight saw cut through the exact center of the board."

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