Advice for the Temporally Challenged

“How come all the great advice I gave in response to the last eZine isn’t in here?” – E. Zeely Knfuzed

Editor: Do you own a calendar?

“Rob, I’ve got a great suggestion for what you can do in retirement. There’s this little hobby that’s been giving me lots of fun for the past few years. All you need is some wood and a few tools …” – Bobby Shopperatt

“Rob, I can’t express how much I’ll miss reading your eZine editorials now that you’ve decided to hang up your shop apron. But, for those woodworking novices who look to you for enlightenment, I do feel compelled to point out some significant safety issues in your editorial photos this time. I would NEVER, EVER, surf on my combination machine without wearing safety glasses. And why didn’t you roll up your sleeves when doing yoga poses on your contractor’s saw? Juggling circular saws without hearing protection?! Simply inexcusable. – R. Alf Nater

“Thanks so much for the plans for the paperweight! This thing has so many uses it’s unbelievable! Not only can I use it to hold my papers down, but I can also set my beer can on top of it and not leave a wet ring on those same papers! Or, I could use it to prop open my shop door for a cooling breeze on those hot days. Tip it sideways and stand it on end, and it keeps my Aa-Zz set of unabridged encyclopedias from tipping over! And more!” – Levon Innapast

“The Saw of the Month Club is just what I’ve been looking for! As soon as they expand into band saws and table saws, I’ve got the excuse I’ve been looking for to condemn my neighbor’s property by right of eminent domain and expand my shop space – and believe me, I’ve been looking for a reason to do that for a long, long time.” – Mayor S. Lee Zee

“I’ve been part of Saw of the Month Club for two years! Now, I’ve got so many saws there’s one set for every angle. Floor space has gotten tight in my shop, but my miters are dead-on every time. Maybe you’ll accept this as a Trick of the Trade? Anyway, can’t recommend SOMC highly enough!!!” – Serious Lee Broke

“I cannot recommend that Tim-bur app enough. It didn’t take wearing rosewood-colored glasses to quickly find someone who could add a hot and steam-bendy situation to my shop. Wow! Those sinuous curves are something to admire! We’ll be getting jiggy together for a long time to come.” – Bodicia R. Ipper

“About that Tricks video, there’s nothing wrong with being crooked, at least in woodworking. But, there’s one thing I wished you could have shown: what’s the best way to glue the bark back on?” – Ima B. Leever

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