Top 20 Clever Captions

Those of you who’ve submitted captions to our cabinet saw photo have proven this: woodworkers can take a goofy photo and made something good of it. At well over 100 captions submitted—and counting—it’s clear we’ve got a collective funnybone!

I’ve been wanting to pick a “Top Ten” list, but between the captions posted to our Facebook page and here on the blog, there are too many good ones for just ten fingers. (And despite all those cabinet saws, I still have ten to count with.) So, with Matt Becker’s help—he’s got all ten digits, too—we’ve picked 20 of the funniest ones. If yours didn’t make the cut (yeah, couldn’t help that one), it’s nothing personal. These just made us laugh out loud…but there were plenty of chuckles and smiles for the rest.

See if you agree:

• Sniffing the thinners will usually leave you seeing double or even triple…in this case, there was more than one bottle open… [Patrick]

• Got a handyman infestation? Set any one of these fine traps and he won’t be able to resist the temptation. [Anton]

• Now where did I put that universal blade changing wrench? [woodgeek]

• Kirk to Engineering: the transporter is stuck on “Copy” again [Ken]

• Now this…is a real heavy metal group. [Bob Shubert]

• And then I woke up and realized it was just a dream. [Gary Storme]

• Cabinet saws of the world, UNITE! [Josef Cook]

• Where do good woodworkers go when they die? [Carol Oster]

• And that’s how, with a few minor adjustments, you can turn a regular cabinet saw into seven cabinet saws. [Adam]

• On a dare, Chris Marshall attempted to build realistic wooden replicas of cabinet saws in his workshop. Can you guess which one is the real saw? [Laura]

• The saws huddled together, trying to choose a leader… [William Babb]

• Tired of making blade changes, Joe equips his shop with a saw for each application. [Karl]

• First saw takes it down to 6 inches, next one to 5, then 4…, and eventually, A TOOTHPICK! [Chet Kloss]

• OK sir, can you pick out the saw that cut your finger out of the lineup? Take your time, they can’t see you. [Lamar]

• Rip,rip,rip,rip,rip,rip,crosscut. [Philip "Less Digits" Mielke]  Yikes, “Less Digits,” this would NOT be the shop for you!

• Apparently, he misunderstood the concept of “gang ripping.” [Chris@flairwoodworks]

• What could I do? They were ALL on sale! [Patricia Tuttle]

• My name is Dan, and I’m a Saw-aholic. [Dan Valleskey]

• This takes resawing to a whole new level. [Jim Daniels]

• Oh my, I guess I shouldn’t have kept hitting enter when I submitted my order. [Gary D. Jones]

Nice job, all.

Catch you in the shop,

Chris Marshall, Field Editor

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About Chris Marshall

Chris Marshall has been writing for Woodworker's Journal as a contributing editor and field editor since 2001. Prior to that, he spent five years developing home improvement and woodworking books. He's written five of them and has served as a contributing writer on many more. A wood and tool junkie since childhood, Chris thoroughly enjoys building projects and reviewing woodworking tools for the Journal. When he's not assembling new machinery, sawing parts, taking photos or crunching text for an upcoming story, he enjoys spending time with his family and a houseful of pets at their home in rural Ohio.

2 thoughts on “Top 20 Clever Captions

  1. I enjoyed the table saw reviews. I however have had a bad experience with a fairly new saw from Hitachi. The throat plate has an unusually wide opening of over 3/4 of an inch. No other brand saw I have seen to date has more than 1/2 of an inch total. I sent them an e-mail 2-3 months back and never was contacted about this safety problem. I wish they would at least send out zero clearance plates so you can cut your own slot for your blade. I nicked three fingers last summer and only after using the saw more this fall noticed the safety problem. I have normally used a different saw for my 1/4 inch banding strips which have sawed thousands of. Usually on a Rckwell/Delta, Powermatic, or Craftsman table saw. All of these saws are fine for intricate narrow pieces.

    Concered about others–SAFETY!

  2. Why can people have no responsibility for what they do these days.I have been unfortunate but mostly foolish having injuring myself not once but twice with my tablesaw. Luckily I have rcovered with fully functional digits. Not once have I ever thought of suing the saw manufacturer. I healed and went back to work within 6 weeks, a little leary for a while.Here is the kicker. I am already an amputee (missing my left arm) Love wood working and have no intentions of stopping.REMEMBER they make push sticks for a reason.

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